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The University of California Student Association Board, eager as always to conform to stereotype, voted to BDS (boycott, divest, sanction) America in addition to usual whipping boy Israel. Because of how horrible we all are, etc. Yes, this really happened.

Never mind the smug moral posturing of these straight-out-of-central-casting young trustafarians, or the obvious idiocy of the vote (where are you going to have your Starbucks flown in from then, pal?).

Instead, let’s stipulate that America is indeed guilty of various crimes stemming from the Cheney occupation of Iraq, the drone war, racism, Michael Brown, and Eminem winning the Grammy for best rapper. So… what country would you prefer instead?

The students were at least aware enough to add a few other countries to their naughty list: Brazil, Russia, Egypt, Indonesia, among a few others. Presumably because they too failed to live up to the moral standards of these young students. But who does that leave? The austerity-loving, youth-hating EU? Australia or Japan, both of whose racism makes America look like a post-racial utopia by comparison? China???

No, the only countries left are those who don’t have to get their hands dirty at all, either because they lack the power or because bigger states or organizations do it for them. These would be Canada; some individual Euro states like Sweden; or victim states like the Ukraine and Palestine. (Let’s ignore, for the moment, the pure evil nature of the men who run the last entry on that list.) These would be the states that fallen, fallen America, so corrupt and sinful, should look up to, in the minds of these UC students, who feel too pure and moral for this base world.

I’ve said it before: the far left has more in common with Christian conservatives than either side would care to admit.

Of course, should any of these states ever find themselves in a position of power, they too would quickly be judged guilty by the far left simply for fighting their enemies. If America ceased to exist, after all, the hobo-bearded guys who don’t like the West any more than they like pictures of Mohammed would just start plotting to bomb Canada instead. Hell, one of them already shot up the Canadian parliament just last year. And if Canada didn’t have America’s oh-so-evil Middle Eastern operations to rely on for protection and intel… guess what? Yes, they’d have to start their own.

But please, oh wise trustafarians of UC. Do tell us more about how moral and righteous you are, and how debased and sinful the rest of us are compared to you. We’ll be listening. Listening about as well as Willy Wonka.